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At the age of five, I was attacked in some way that blocked my connection to the source. From that night, I knew something was wrong with the way I felt in my life, and I was sad. Then came school, well, that lead to more reasons to want to die with school bullies and being tormented and physically abused.
I would run home from school trying to escape the torture of school life and spent many hours alone in my bedroom crying and not wanting to be alive. Yet, I was only a young boy not knowing why I felt this way.
Then, at age seven I found out I was adopted, as well as my sister with severe disabilities, so I felt even my parents were strangers to me. More feelings of being alone and disconnected from the world. I was molested by a priest at this time as well. Feelings of self-hatred, low self-worth, and low self-esteem grew with suicidal thoughts becoming a normal dominant thought pattern.
Even though I had these persistent thoughts of suicide, I could never do it but wanted someone to kill me so I could leave this body and the heavy feeling of my life.
When I realized I was adopted, I started to question who I was in this life and where I was before this birth. Yes, I know it sounds strange, but this was my question. It took me on a journey through life, seeking what life was about and wanting to feel joy and happiness.
At age 20 I found the Hare Krishna movement where I felt, I belonged. I liked the food and the idea of reincarnation so followed that movement for a few years ... But still felt empty and sad.
I got married and had a son, but still was not happy in my life. I was now in my 30s and still searching for relief from feeling this way. After ten years of unhappily married life, I left.
I was always very sensitive within my body and feeling energy, and I started to get pain in my body so much so, that I tried everything to relive it.
This was part of the self-discovery journey. I came across Reiki, so became a Master but experienced no pain relief, and still suicidal thoughts had not gone away. Over time, I looked for many other healing modalities, still searching for a way of feeling good.
So four long-term relationship failures and moving house 34 times through all of this pain and suffering, I never took anti-depression medication or used drugs or alcohol to escape myself.
Now in my 40s, I traveled the world seeking answers to my questions. From meeting Gurus in India like Sai Baba, meditating in Mary Magdalene’s cave in the south of France, to being inside the pyramids of Giza. I visited Stonehenge and traveled on a cruise ship with Jerry and Esther Hicks in Mexico. The search went on.
Now in my 50s, I had been to see many healers just wanting to feel joy and happiness, but still, I had to find a way to get some relief from me. During this search, I had come across information about negative entities and energies which attack your soul and body. Rudolf Steiner talks about them, and there are many references to them throughout history. I did not believe in them but started seeing them so I changed my belief system about this topic.
I started to understand that it was not me having these negative thoughts and feelings, but outside evil forces that psychically attacked me and made me feel this way. I had always wondered why I was having these negative thoughts but somehow I knew it was not me or who I am.
These negative energies feed off our negative feelings and vibrations. That is their food source, just like ours is vegetables. Everything is energy in this world. We don’t easily “see” them as they come from a different dimension and as humans, we only see a fraction with our human eyes of the vast colour light spectrum which is in this universe. Some do see them, like me and it is possible. but it is not a good thing to want to see.
It was then I knew I could find a way by using my hands. I knew I was a healer but had to find a way to do it. I had not given up in my search.
So in July 2020, it happened to me. I found it by using my hands and heart. I could clear these negative energies within me. WOW, the feeling of JOY and Happiness which came over me, kept expanding with love and joy.
I thought, maybe I could become a healer, it does not matter if it’s depression or sickness in the body. It’s all negative energy, thoughts & emotions which can be cleared through this process. It works. Just ask my clients and they will tell you!
I used to say to myself "How bad do you want to feel good?"
21 Wollombi Rd Bilgola Plateau 2107